Something happened to me recently which I just needed to share. A pretty life defining moment in my opinion, I just needed to find a plane trip to put it on paper.
I had the pleasure of going to a women's day “goddess” brunch last week. My first thought, “wonderful, a room full of affluent ladies, networking, brunching, goddessing”. The thought that followed… “what the hell does one wear to a goddess brunch?”
I searched my cupboard for my most “goddessy” outfit and felt pretty set. Kim Kardashians new gold and perspex stilettos, black chiffon pants and a tailored black crop top, sunnies, hair, unstoppable.
Until, I hopped out of the car at the venue along the renowned Camps bay strip.
My first glimpse of the ladies there and I wanted to get right back into my car and head home. Why had I dressed like I was going to a famous persons funeral?
There were floral prints and white linen, caftans and flower crowns. There was also gin, and brunch (not to mention a hair and massage station). Having not yet eaten in my mad rush to goddess, I popped on my sunnies and entered the affluent affair.
Through the glittering room of energy, I spotted my fellow goddess and made my way to her. Her opening line, “wow I love your outfit” and mine, “that top is so flattering on you, its gorgeous”.
Stellar service slid a gin & tonic into my manicured hand and I was happy, soon suppressing my thoughts on my funeral attire and having a great time.
A few gins later and a rare moment of silence in the room, one of the speakers posed a question “what makes you a women?"
What makes me a women? A few eyes locked on to each other waiting for someone to talk first, and then someone did.
A fierce female I had just met, opened up and announced that she got dressed that morning, one of her favourite cocktail dresses and felt fabluous, only that feeling retreated as soon as she got out of her car. Taking one look at the other goddesses attire, she wanted to sprint back to the safty of her sedan.
This story sounded familiar.
Before the full stop of her sentence made itself known, my brunch date proclaimed “me too! I felt so good about my outfit until I got here and suddenly didn’t want to go inside.”
A sudden table of bobble heads as the stories resonated, I felt it was turn to stand up on this podium and let them all know that I had exactly the same experience.
We all grinned at eachother, having just realised we were part of the same tribe of self aware women in a world of other humans that we tend to compare ourselves to.
The fierce lady was wearing an emerald cocktail dress, my goddess date an off the shoulder shirt and skinnies and I was in my noir best. Three totally different looks. Three totally different goddesses. One feeling of negative self awareness.
We can all be plagued by our negative visions of ourselves. I had selected my own outfit then doubted it when I compared myself to others who in essence, were doing exactly the same thing to me. If we can so easily boost other people in our own minds, why are we not doing this for ourselves? Imagine looking into the mirror to look for something good, and not a mascara smudge or an acting out brow hair.
As this was sinking in, a vision of a woman glided over to me and in the most unasuming way told me that she had noticed me from across the room when I walked in (and here I was being funeral discrete) and she just wanted to let me know she loved my look.
What a gorgeous woman she was, and not because of what she looked like, but because she had it in her heart to compliment me and share her positive thought with me. In that moment she boosted me, she made me feel backed up and admired and also just pretty cool.
That’s what it means to be a woman.
As women we have the magic ability to be both powerful and nurturing, and what a truly precious gift to use it to grow each other, as well as ourselves.
Any negative self thought I had after that was flung far and wide, leaving us goddesses to do what we do best… Goddess, of course.